10 Signs Dad is Ruling the Roost

Last month I went back to work substitute teaching, and my husband has been in charge of getting two elementary school kids up and on the bus, and entertaining the kindergartener and preschooler until their afternoon school times. I’ve noticed some consistent behavior in this last month that has prompted the following thoughts.


Top 10 signs Dad is ruling the roost:

1. The dishes are disappearing from the kitchen cabinets and drawers. (In other words, they are in the bedrooms, basement, behind the couch, under the dining room table, in the bathroom sink, possibly in the trash.)

2. Lipstick and toothpaste tubes are found, chewed & demolished by a dog left unattended.

3. All the Halloween candy is gone within a month. 5 kids’ worth. 1 month.

4. The kids keep coming home from school wearing the same outfits I just cleaned and put in the top of their drawers.

5. Pre-packaged snacks FOR SCHOOL LUNCH USE ONLY are disappearing rapidly.

6. I’m pretty sure the kids are using the hand lotion in the bathroom to wash their hands.

7. None of my boys have underwear in the dirty clothes pile.

8. Brushing teeth once a day is better than not at all, right? Right?

9. Suggestions of a homemade peanut butter and jelly sandwich are met with blank stares unless I package it with cut-up apples, Sprite, and a toy.

10. There’s a mysterious brown stain in the middle of my bedroom floor for which no one is claiming any knowledge or responsibility.


They make substitute teaching feel like a day at the spa.

One Response to “10 Signs Dad is Ruling the Roost”

  1. LilBS says on :

    Thanks, Fran! 🙂

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